POEMS
by Stephen Lewis
FOR KATERINA
I whispered your name and the breeze held its' breath a while
The flowers shrank to buds, ashamed of their feeble smile.
I whispered your name and the sun was not so proud,
It blushed a shade of crimson and hid behind a cloud.
I whispered your name and the music missed a beat,
Each note wept a silent tone, fell broken at my feet.
I whispered your name and it diminished every other word,
I whispered your name but I
don't think you even heard.
(NOTE: 15 years after writing
this poem for Katerina, we finally married in Moscow in October
2014)
VISIONS OF LEAVING
Leave me,
In grey dawn depart,
With never spoken words on your lips,
In fleeting thought and fast fading shape, go.
Silently,
Take back your glances,
Crowned in sorrow of passion spent,
All is blind and abused in ignorance.
Whispers,
Misty breaths like kisses,
Reflections of love once imagined,
I cannot hold them, cannot touch you.
Darkness,
No candle burns tonight,
Her footsteps melt into rain,
I am alone.
ONE AMONG THE WEEPING
If I weep it's not for you
Though my eyes are closed up with dust
And you try to hide your lies
Under a skin so thinly veiled.
I will not look back
Though I slip upon these paths
I will not fall
And if i weep it's not for you.
If I weep it's not for love
Kind thoughts perish at my passing
I am discarded and scattered
A carpet of frozen tears
At last unraveled
Though voices curse me
I won't look back
And if I weep it's not for love.
If I weep it's not for her
Angry words in colours fading
Satisfied to dream of life
In shadows she is happy
But not with me.
If her spite haunts you
And her lust reviles you
And my tears confuse you
If I am weeping
It's just for me.
GARBO In MIND
Two worlds that can never meet
Trapped inside a glass dream
Within reach, yet so cruel.
What warmth can a picture retain ?
You talk only for me
Yet forever blind.
In those fleeting moments
Could you be mine ?
The magic touches me
To turn back the reels of time
Unfolded and lost
For I have a lived a strange dream
Of light and shadow.
But where do I find you ?
You live only on a piece of film ?
Slowly fading to harsh oblivion.
No. You stand before me
A woman whose beauty can never fade
Yet always so weary
In strength so fragile
So afraid,
And alone.
But I never asked to be alone
A lamp lights your face on my wall
Restless, I close my eyes
Unable to sleep.....
THE ICEMAN
Tear drops in the city
that fall like acid rain
burn into your flesh
'til you forget your name
the streets on which you walk
are empty, almost bare
no one wants the Iceman
but he's always there.
'tighter than four walls
is the prison around me
will no one take away this mask
and let these cold eyes see'
but no one will know his grief
no one will share his pain
alone the Iceman walks on
in the pouring rain.
tonight in his dreams
he would sell his frozen soul
for just a glimpse of the sun
a moment from the cold
even the Devil won't touch him
trapped in his frozen shell
alone the Iceman walks on
in his private Hell.
'the rain is always falling
wherever these feet walk
mocking voices calling
but no one ever talks
and if the sun breaks through
then I'll be on my way
no one wants the Iceman
to spoil their sunny day.
Is it worth fighting for
if no one gives a damn
no one loves the Iceman
but that is who I am.'
POOR BILLY
Poor Billy born blue
what are you going to do
no one to take care of you
how we despair for you.
----------
Billy bound in chains of guilt
slowly sinking in the silt
of ruin foundations somehow built
on ground was sacred blood was spilt.
Billy born of wings of contradiction
imprisoned by his fools restriction
wounds of pride and self-infliction
suffocated jealousies of fact and fiction.
Billy bled of sorrows leeches
by a blind prophet who history teaches
a short life to him who preaches
spilling life on far off beaches.
Billy blew cobwebs and dust
from his shelf he did not trust
to support his burden that he must
unload his shoulders free from rust.
Billy bangs a warriors drum
plays a tuneless guitars strum
asking that the deaf should come
to drink with him the poisoned rum.
Billy builds a funeral pyre
dances barefoot on barbed wire
breaths deep the smoke of virgin fire
calls his faithless friend his liar.
Billy buried ash and soil
deluded now his heirs must toil
bought and paid but never loyal
no one's day his death did spoil.
DEATH OF A PHARAOH
Who would notice among the sullen faces
A much complained old man
Whose memory was long
But his time has been and gone.
Around him they gather
Silent, bowed in trepidation
All but the lonely little man
Swallowed up in dying.
His dignity sealed inside
The partial shelter of his dreams
Bound to a mortal dread
Held fast in antique chains
Primitive and cultured.
Courage betrayed
Something insubstantial
His over-civilized mind twists
Before the gaze of his Gods
He wept a last yawning thought
That brought life to a close.
FINAL FAREWELL
Her cerements white
Flickered yellow candlelight
'neath starry skies
Where loves breath lies
Nameless nymph of fairest skin
What secrets there to lie within
Oh hated curse, most despised
To take to bed so young a bride
Who knew no other love but mine
And now to death is concubine
In unspoken prayer she rests
Hands clasped cold upon her breast.
NIGHT
Black columns of midnight rising
Smoke screens of indiscretion
Stale perfumed shades
Charlatan lovers
Squinting shape pushers
Silhouettes of twilight
Sordid flesh charades
Delicate porcelain features
Painted ladies in saffron weep
Tragic strewn, couch-like Camilles
Consumptive whispers
Shadow-sylphs preserved
But fading too soon
Romance never expected
Harsh neon sentries
At doorways to a thrill
Hardly spoken greetings
He sees her, he knew her once
But no more
She wipes the fog from her eyes
Hesitant, the pale glare of dawn
Experiments and explores its path
Destiny cheated prophets smile
Then weep for one another
Her sad eyes glazed
With refused sleep
She pushes the door
Steps in....
THE RETREAT
Was it the sound of death
Drifting on the breeze.
Locked in the grip
of beautiful desolation.
Blackened faces
Gaunt and bearded,
Caught in an instant of torment.
Fingers bound in rags
No comfort from the kiss of frost
Thin silver shroud
Fist clenched ever tighter
Feeling less.
Tears frozen in his eyes
Shed in fear of an agony he cannot feel.
Great coat moulded to the earth.
One empty plain melts
into another horizon.
See how your comrades sleep
In the warmth of falling snow
Fading into grotesque human landscape.
Rest a while,
sleep.
TOMORROW SHE NEEDS ME
She will not believe in anything
that she cannot possess,
Wears a crucifix of gold
but will not confess,
To any faith in its vision
With which she was blessed,
It just lay there cold
On her naked breast.
My tongue traces its form
and she whispers my name
But fingers tear my face
from the hanging frame.
When love turns to anger
Yes I can hate
even you naked
in your translucent state,
Covering your nakedness
in flesh desired
I see you are weary
of love you grow tired.
I search for you
deep in the folds
of your skin that pain
caresses and moulds,
Need overcoming
my fear and dread
How many hours
you spent pulling those threads.
THE GREATEST BETRAYAL
This vision he sees as slowly he dies
Blurred by tears it fills his eyes
Of years yet to come filled with suffering and hate
Knowing they would understand too late
Softly he wept though his body was broken
When he saw what would come of the truth he had spoken
His message perverted and used in a game
Atrocities and wars fought in his name
Grief turned to despair when he saw at the end
The futures great friends who would call him friend
Splendid temples they'd build and the people deceive
'Forget what he said, this is what you'll believe.'
He closed his eyes and knew he must fail
Already the blind and confused would hail
This man who had tried to teach them love
As another 'true God from heaven above'
He lifted his head, his soul set free
'My God, why has thou forsaken me.'
THE WALL
Watchers in the tower
Shot him in the back
Cry of freedom strangled
Picture fades to black.
Dark bruised concrete
In the shadow of the wall
Tangled vines of sharpened wire
Buds that never fall
Dancing in the frosty wind
Picked out by ghostly lights
Unwelcome in the shadows
Disturbing secret nights
Watchers in the tower
Shot him in the back
Cry of freedom strangled
Picture fades to black.
POOR JOHNNY
Johnny's mind been died down
wasting in the underground
making noises but no sound
to his limitations tightly bound.
Johnny's head been sanitized
by thoughts that paralyzed
his arms and legs canabalized
to the gods that have materialized.
Johnny's hands been glued together
by the prisoners of flesh whoever
complained bitterly about the weather
in private ceremonies clad in leather.
Johnny's faith been electrocuted out
by Inquisitors who prosecuted doubt
his informers who recruited flout
the Laws of the polluted spout.
Johnny's memory been buried deep
by leper kings who never sleep
with virgin mothers who try to keep
their distance from the lovers leap.
Johnny's tears been dried and filed
by detectives with lists compiled
of days he laughed and nights he smiled
in the company of the most reviled.
Johnny slave to all convention
servant to his own invention
lost in the maze of good intention
too far flung to seek redemption.
Johnny dead was no ones fault
banished memory to the vault
while mourners pull across the bolt
and to his story call a halt.
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